My Ornery Brain (Limerick)

June 9th, 2025

I find learning new words a delight.
But my mind disagrees; it’s a fight!
Seems my crowded old brain
Deems such efforts a strain;
It evicts other words, just for spite.

Penniless Limerick

June 1st, 2025

Since production of pennies is ending,
Is it time for some idiom-mending?
Must the penny be spurned?
Nickel saved, nickel earned?
Dime for thoughts? Is “cute quarter” ascending?

NOT “Mr. Personality” (Limerick)

May 31st, 2025

An old man (who just died) was an ass;
Rather nasty and given to sass.
He, alas, wasn’t tactful.
His gibes were impactful.
(NOT packed full — his funeral Mass.)

Weathering Spring (Limerick)

May 28th, 2025

I wonder just what is the reason
Why spring’s such an ornery season.
First it’s cold, then it’s hot,
Then it’s icy, then not —
Makes me ask whether spring is just teasin’.

Kitchen Duties (Limerick)

May 24th, 2025

Hubby’s cooking is NOT to be missed.
My job’s cleanup; that’s how I assist.
Hone my skills at the stove?
‘Twould be pointless, by Jove,
For my cooking-chops just don’t exist.

Whistling In The Wind (Limerick)

May 22nd, 2025

I have never been able to whistle.
“So who cares?” you might say in dismissal.
But a gal who can toot
On the oboe and flute
Should be able to whistle a bissel.

Whiny Writer (Limerick)

May 19th, 2025

Whined a writer, I’m rusty and blocked.
I just can’t get my juices unlocked.
It’s the fault of my muse
Who’s gone AWOL. J’accuse!
Can’t remember the last time we talked.

Tricky Magician (Limerick)

May 17th, 2025

That magician is handsome and nice.
But I only went out with him twice:
He’s obsessed with The Matrix
And kept doing date tricks.
I HATE tricks, so date him? No dice!

Colorful Limerick

May 16th, 2025

A young fellow scrawled something quite mean
In bright orange, dark red, and lime green.
I must hasten to note
I don’t mind what he wrote.
But that color scheme? Grossly obscene!

The Naïf (Limerick)

May 14th, 2025

“You’re too trusting! Stop being naive!
You’ve been conned. You’re a snap to deceive.
I can tell from one look
That your boyfriend’s a crook.
Your credulity’s hard to believe!”

Bad Audition (Limerick)

May 13th, 2025

A fine actress who’d hoped for the lead
In an upcoming film failed to heed
The advice from her spouse,
Who had warned, “Never grouse
At auditions and don’t read on speed!”

This is NO Spin (Limerick)

May 6th, 2025

I infrequently recommend shows,
For my fav might make someone else doze.
But I’m deep in the thrall
Of the series Étoile
About artists who dance on their toes.

Weather Gripes (Limerick)

May 4th, 2025

The weather this spring’s not conforming
To seasonal norms. I’m not warming
To its ups and its downs,
So I keep wearing frowns.
As for clothes, fickle temps hinder norming.

The Engagement (Limerick)

April 25th, 2025

When my boyfriend proposed, mom was pleased:
“No returns, no exchanges,” she teased.
She was thrilled with our match,
For she thought him a catch…
And her “old maid” concerns were appeased.

Limerick Ditty

April 10th, 2025

I’m attempting to write a short ditty
About something that’s dreadfully shitty.
But I’m getting the blues
From my options — can’t choose
The right shitstorm. (Things lately ain’t pretty!)

Clutter Conflict (Limerick)

April 8th, 2025

An old fellow who’d putter all day
Would refuse to throw refuse away.
When his wife tried to deal
With his clutter, he’d squeal
As he rescued his rubbish array.

An Arresting Lass (Limerick)

April 7th, 2025

As the cop brought her in, the young lass
Acknowledged she’d done something crass:
“In hindsight,” she said,
When her rights had been read,
“I shouldn’t have bared my cute ass.”

The Pissed-Off Boss (Limerick)

April 6th, 2025

“You are constantly spouting some beef,”
Said his boss. “It’s non-stop. No relief!
Your complaints (mostly petty)
Don’t stick. They’re spaghetti.
Do your job and stop giving me grief!”

NOT A “Party Gal!” (Limerick)

April 2nd, 2025

For some inexplicable reason, tomorrow (April 3) is World Party Day.

Large festivities aren’t my scene.
I’m a hermit, at heart, and not keen
On behavior vivacious,
Flirtatious, or gracious.
Yes, NOT being seen has its sheen.

Boorish Limerick

March 29th, 2025

An old boor who believes that he’s hot
Is considered decidedly NOT.
He’s called “too cool for school”
And an “arrogant fool
With less charm than your average bot.”